Parenting is hard, teenagers are rough #2

As all of you who read the first blog are aware our son, Skyler, ran away on March 13th. We heard from him about five hours after he left because he called to tell us where our car was. We did get our car back, but he was no where to be found once we got there. It was the worst feeling as a parent I have ever experienced.

Monday came and we had to face everyone at school and let them know what was going on. Skyler wasn't at school so an explanation was needed. Jarred and I spoke with the principals, but kept it to just them until the blog was posted last Tuesday. Those first three days were by far the worst. We had to deal with the police in Lebanon, but also the police in other areas because everyone was looking for him. On Tuesday March 15 we made the decision to report him to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children. I didn't feel like the police were doing enough for us and wanted to do everything I could to find him. By Wednesday the NCMEC had gotten a missing poster together for us to start circulating. They also sent it to police stations in Indiana. 

By Thursday the missing poster had been shared over 1000 times. This gave us hope that he would be found and hopefully quickly. By that night we had responses in different areas of where he might have been that he had been spotted. On Friday morning, 1:30am to be exact, we had a sheriff come banging on our door and waking us up. This sheriff came to inform us that they had a tip that he had been spotted and he wanted us to know. However, we still hadn't heard anything from Skyler and were worried about him. There were a couple of leads we had, but we didn't know if they would pan out or not. 

All of this was going on and spring break was coming up. We were excited for a break from school, but weren't sure how it was going to be since we were missing a kid. We had previously promised the little kids that we were going to visit our friend in Saint Louis over break. They were extremely excited, but we weren't sure how this was going to work. After much deliberation we decided to take a break and bring the them to Saint Louis so they could enjoy their break and keep something normal.

We left for Saint Louis on Sunday morning. We arrived around 1pm, Saint Louis time. We went to our friends house and did some things with him before heading to the park. We had just arrived at the park when Jarred's phone rang. Jarred has his hands full so I answered it. When I said hello and the voice on the other end said hello back I was shocked. I didn't know if I could believe what I thought I was hearing or if I needed to be cautious. I decided to be cautious and asked who it was. After a few hello's back and forth I asked if it was Skyler, IT WAS!!! I was so excited to hear from him and shocked at the fact that he had called. We talked for a little bit and asked about where he had been and what was going on. Then he asked if we could come get him. Since we are in Saint Louis that was going to be hard to do, but we planned on getting him as soon as we got back in town. Another plan came about with being able to have someone pick him up. He was picked up and taken to my parents house. 

Skyler is back with us! We are super excited but also nervous for what is ahead. We know that we have a lot to do and get through before everything will be "okay" but we will do that. 

I want to say thank you to everyone who has helped us with sharing his missing information and being concerned for our family. This has been one of the hardest things to go through as parents. I know that it's not over and that we have a lot to do still, but we are working on it. 

Thank you to everyone who has been praying, sharing, and looking. We really appreciate it!!!

Parenting is hard, teenagers are rough

It's been a long time since I have blogged about anything  going on. Jarred and I are super busy with the kids and don't have a whole lot of time really. In the fall they played soccer so we had practices and games to attend. Then at the beginning of winter the boys played basketball so we had practices and games again. Kenzi didn't do basketball but she still had Girl Scout stuff so we did that also. Cookie season for Girl Scouts is just ending and baseball/softball will begin soon, but we have a little break.

In the last 3 years there has been a lot of stuff going on with our teenage son. He is very smart, intelligent kid in school and doesn't have to work hard for his good grades. However, he has made some very poor decisions in which my husband and I have been lost in what we should do for them. At 14 he stole our truck and went on a joy ride. We figured it out when the mirror was broken and there was no glass on the driveway. His excuse didn't match what he told us and it was not the truth so we made him pay for the mirror and then took away his privilege of getting a permit at fifteen. Then at fifteen he ran away and was gone about 12 hours. As a parent that was the hardest thing to go through with him. We didn't know where he was or what was happening to him. At the time we didn't do anything with the cops about it and was lucky that he chose to come home and contacted us that day. That was a time it had to do with his girlfriend at the time whom we had decided to not allow him to have contact with because she was in a bad situation and was making him worse also. Then we hit 16! Shortly after hitting 16 Jarred and I decided that we may let him try to get his permit. He had been doing better, so we thought, and we wanted him to be able to drive some before going off to college. In November I took him to get his permit and he passed with no issues. We drove around and he was okay to but had some issues like any new driver. In December we decided to get him a smart phone for Christmas but we had some rules and put family base on the phone. For him it was good for us to do because of the issues we had already been having. He was also made to get a job this summer, in August, he started working at a local grocery store. He was doing good, but we found out in December that a day he said he was sick he wasn't. He stayed home from school for 3 days supposedly sick, never had issues with him skipping school before this, which he wasn't sick at all. He snuck out of the house and stole our car once again to drive to his gf's house and pick her up. They went to breakfast and then back. This was before he had his permit in October that he did this. Had we known this then he wouldn't of been allowed to get his permit. Once we found out we revoked his permit and started taking our keys everywhere with us. We also changed our alarm code so he didn't know it. After his grounding was over for this he was excited and was able to do more things with his gf. This went well for a while until he was able to be on his own one day because he had to work and Jarred and I had things with the little kids to do, Kenzi's birthday party. We went to a mall and had her party at Build A Bear where each kid got to make their own. During the party I got a call from his gf's mom that she caught them at her house on their own. This means that he snuck out of the house and walked all the way across town to be with her. Our rule and his gf's mom's rule is that an adult must be around. This wasn't the case in this instance so he got grounded again. Since we have had so much trouble and have to be out of town a lot and he is on his own because of work Jarred and I decided he needed to quit his job so that he could go with us. He really hated this rule and decided he wasn't going to follow it. On the morning of March 13th, 2016 Jarred woke up to find that Skyler was not in his room and that our car was missing. He called me at 7am asking what he should do and I told him to contact the LPD and report the car stolen and him as a runaway. Skyler had left a note saying "I will return it. Please let me go." As a parent there was no way I was going to let my son go. I love him and don't want anything to happen to him. We did end up reporting the car this time and we reported him as a runaway. We figured out that he was paying attention to us when we put in the alarm code because he entered it on the control panel at 3:24am. He went by his gf's house and tried getting her to go but she wouldn't go. He then preceded to drive for about 6 hours and ended up in Edinburgh, IN. He called us from there to let us know that our car was parked in the Edinburgh Mall Parking lot and asked again for us to "just let him go." We immediately contacted our LPD who then called the EPD. Jarred and I drove down there, but he was no where in site and the only thing we found was our car and the police. He hasn't contacted us since. As of March 14th he was checking Facebook, but he never responded to me or anyone else that messaged him that I know of. The police are still looking for him both here in Lebanon and in Edinburgh. I am hoping that they will found some information on him and find him soon, but we don't know how long it will be.

I never would have imagined running away and can't process why kids do this. I know that many kids have done this and that most return, but I just pray that he safe and found soon. The National Center for Missing andExploited Children has been notified and will start helping us look for him. Please keep him in your prayers and ask for him to come home. We miss him, love him, and want him to be found.